The Make-Do-Girl's Guide to Photographing Layouts (With Cats)

Step 1 - Find a day when there is some amount of daylight coming down from the sky. If this is the dead of Winter, a snow day home early from work will do.

Step 2 - Open window blinds as far as they will go. Turn on all lights in room, as 1 room with 1 large porch door, will not emit enough light in the Dead of WINTER.

Step 3 - Set up photo "studio" with large plastic box (used to keep kittens from eating baked goods) as object to hold layouts up vertically.

Step 4 - Attach camera to bendable Joby tripod. Adjust legs so camera will actually stand upright.

Step 5 - Position layout against plastic box in front of camera.

Step 6 - Turn on camera. Turn off flash, set to close-up mode, set 2 second timer to outlast button-pressing-jiggles. Adjust camera repeatedly in an attempt to get uncooperating Joby into the correct somewhat straight position.

Step 7 - Remove curious cat from between camera and Layout.

Step 8 - Take photos. Take 2 photos to heighten chances of a useable photo.

Step 9 - Take a third photo after forgetting to set 2 second timer resulting in blurry second photo.

Step 10 - Switch to next layout.

Step 11 - Chase away kittens from coffee table setup.

Step 12 - Repeat steps 8 - 10.

Step 13 - Retrieve camera from floor where it landed when knocked over by kittens who HAD to orally investigate camera strap.

Step 14 - Stomp into kitchen and feed cats and dog 40 minutes early, to keep them busy for awhile.

Step 15 - Hurriedly repeat steps 8 - 10 before animals finish eating.

And THAT is how a Make-Do-Girl takes layout photographs in the Dead of Winter, during a snowstorm, with 3 curious cats and a dog who just wants to be loved.

Joseph Benjamin "Joey" Cat.

Public Enemy Number 1